Playing Stork
by chipofmintchocolate
Summary: When my friend brought up the topic of babies in our skype conversation, she unwittlingly signed herself up for Grayson family story-time, in which I narrate the events leading up to the birth of Artemis and Dick's first child.


******Also Featuring:** Other random facts about Traught family life, some Crock mother-daughter bonding, Roy and Artemis as cranky siblings-in-law, Zatanna and M'gann + baby showers, half-naked Dick running around in public, and preggers!Artemis

**Dedicated to: **Rosie (chibipooh), who was patient enough to listen to me babble out this sotory on skype, and Beth (superblys), Ben Grayson's other mama. We came up with the orginal concept of him together, and he's our precious Traught headcanon baby.

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**Playing Stork**

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**Chip:** pft Beth (superblys) and I concocted Traught babies the other day, and one of them was named Benjamin Grayson, because we thought Ben Grayson had an ultra fab sound to it

**Chip:** and there was going to be a middle girl child and a youngest boy who we hadn't decided on names for

**Chip:** (speaking of, need to talk to her about the details for them)

**Chip:** to give you an idea, Ben Grayson was supposed to have more prominent vietamese features (as in he looks like his mom but has black hair and dark blue eyes)

**Chip:** something a little like this

**Chip:**

**Rosie:** OMG A CHILD

**Chip:** but with features that are a tad bit softer

**Chip:** you know like typical biracial/multiracial children

**Chip:** who have kind of muted but distinct features

**Chip:** like everything is kind of evened out

**Chip:** which is why kids of multiracial families are some of the most  
beautiful things to grace this planet earth ngl  
_  
_

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_(a week or two goes by…)_

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**Chip:** maybe I'll write some YJ stuff this weekend too (:

**Rosie:** maybe is a baby just waiting to say yes

**Chip:** a baby?

**Chip:** a baby

**Chip:** do you mean a baby idea

**Chip:** or literal Traught spawn

**Rosie:** i would literally marry you (via the internet) if you wrote a fic with traught and their baby

**Rosie:** i am a sucker for OC children even for characters who would never want to be parents

**Chip:** babies are adorable and amazing 33

**Chip:** especially when you make them

**Chip:** and don't have to be pregnant with them but just create them one day

**Chip:** and get to see them coo and ca ca in a little fictional world you created

**Chip:** it's a good feeling

**Chip:** like becoming a mother without having to get pregnant and fat haha

**Rosie:** you feel me

**Rosie:** what would a traught kid be like though  
how would that child grow up

**Chip:** Sit down and let me tell you

**Rosie:** STORY TIME -sits down and waits eagerly-

**Chip:** I personally believe if Artemis and Dick got around to getting married and starting a family

**Chip:** they'd take it really seriously

**Chip:** because Dick's family was offed and Artemis' is a mess

**Rosie:** I feel like I've unexpectedly opened a box full of baby headcanons

**Chip:** so they'd want the best for their potential brood

**Chip:** Artemis and Dick would probably date for about 2-3 or more years, get married, stay married for about 5 years, and then start talking about kids

**Chip:** Dick would want kids pretty badly, but he lets Artemis bring up the conversation and patiently waits until she's ready to talk about it

**Chip:** because she has been really uncertain about this whole having kids thing

**Chip:** she's an independent woman, and Dick understands that, so he doesn't push her in any direction (he figures HE'S not the one who is going to get a huge baby balloon in his lower abdomen and get his organs rearranged, so he wisely lets Arty call the shots)

**Chip:** Artemis' mom really tried to be good, but her dad was a shit father. Artemis' childhood wasn't anything fond to look back on, so she's scared

**Chip:** she's a little terrified that she'll be horrible at this parenting thing

**Chip:** at the time, Artemis has a successful career, Dick is an officer, and the couple still does vigilante work together on the side because hey, that's what they do. they've accepted that as a part of who they both are and a part of their lives

**Chip:** a baby will kind of throw a wrench in that set-up

**Chip:** something's gotta give

**Chip:** one weekend Artemis travels to see Wally and his bride Linda with their adorable little brood, or Raquel and her family if you'd prefer that, and playing with their kids and talking with two happy parents/a happy mother like Raquel gets Artemis thinking

**Chip:** when she returns home, she sits Dick down when they're getting ready for bed

**Rosie:** oh no that's adorable

**Chip:** all serious like

**Chip:** and he knows exactly what she's going to say, because he's Dick and she's Artemis and that's kind of their thing, but he lets her say it anyways without interruption

**Rosie:** (also bless you for accepting Linda as official YJ canon not enough people in the YJ fandom know about her)

**Chip:** Artemis: "Have you ever thought about kids?"

**Chip:** Dick: *rolls over on his side towards her, resting himself on his elbow, and smiles a crooked grin* "I thought you'd never ask."

**Chip:** so they get to…*cough*…work

**Rosie:** that's the best part yay

**Chip:** Artemis eases up on her exercise regime, because you need to be healthy without yourself to the absolute limit/being low on body fat to get pregnant

**Rosie:** something tells me you've been thinking about this for a long, long time

**Chip:** and after a month or two and an 5th anniversary trip to Hong Kong (to see Cassandra Cain hahahaha), her test turns up positive

**Chip:** (actually I haven't thought about this much before you made me think of it today, I just learned all the pregnancy stuff from my mom)

**Chip:** (and Traught stories come naturally to me)

**Chip:** (stop me if I start getting OOC)

**Rosie:** (I'll do my best though you probably know their characters in YJ better than I do. I know comic Dick better than I do YJ Dick )

**Chip:** Artemis is a really twitchy pregnant woman

**Chip:** as in she kind of "nests" (not in a literal fashion where she makes a nest) but she sometimes she gets into a frenzy of energy and movement, doing random things around the house like cleaning things and re-organizing the DVD collection or making 6 sets of arrows in one day (which is 6 dozen arrows) or trying to cook things that are beyond her skill level

**Chip:** and Dick sometimes has to be like SIT DOWN AND REST LET ME SPOIL YOU

**Chip:** NO DO NOT RAKE ALL THE LEAVES IN THE FRONT LAWN

**Chip:** (like my mom…haha I came sooner than planned because she literally raked 6 bags of leaves the week before I was supposed to be due, and that night she started having contractions)

**Rosie:** (omg that reminds me of a drabble i wrote of Damian complaining about a pregnant Stephanie refusing to stop going on patrol. good times, good times)

**Rosie:** (were you born in the leaf pile? )

**Chip:** (NO SILLY)

**Chip:** (I was a November baby but my mom did not break her water in our front lawn hahaha)

**Chip:** she has horrible morning sickness at first, but besides that, her ankles don't swell too much, and she doesn't have breasts that are sensitive/hurt a whole lot like some pregnant women, and not too many weird cravings

**Chip:** though she does demand Thai food/Indian/Vietnamese/Chinese take-out at weird times of night every once in a while

**Chip:** Artemis is sensible enough that she doesn't do vigilante work while she's pregnant (and she makes this decision herself because she doesn't want to risk a miscarriage…even though not being able to be able to go on patrol with Dick for nine months makes her antsy and irritable)

**Chip:** when she starts getting horrible cabin fever ("DICK I'M GOING CRAZY THERE IS NOTHING TO DOOOO")

**Chip:** Dick sets her up with some equipment and she becomes a lower-tech Oracle type of figure to him

**Chip:** lots of snarking over the radio, and Dick brings home takeout when he comes back from patrol sometimes

**Chip:** Whenever Artemis has questions about baby things, she calls Dinah because Dinah knows all things, and she's the mama of all the arrow babies

**Chip:** and then Paula

**Chip:** then Jade

**Chip:** then M'gann

**Chip:** in that order

**Chip:** although she sometimes switches things around according to her mood, and for a few weeks Paula comes over to keep Artemis company and help around the house (right before and after the baby comes), which Artemis really appreciates (homemade Vietnamese food yesss)

**Chip:** Artemis gets really cranky two weeks before her delivery (and no I don't know if pregnant women do that usually, this is just something that came into my head)

**Rosie:** aaaaw mommy/daughter bonding time

**Chip:** Jade comes to visit for a weekend as well during all of this, leaving Roy to babysit Lian (who is now like… 8 at least I'm guessing? And they may have another baby girl or baby boy)

**Chip:** when Artemis is four months along, Zatanna and M'gann throw the best baby shower ever

**Rosie:** can the baby shower involve way too much alcohol (for everyone but arty of course) and several questionable exotic dancers?

**Rosie:** i just love the idea that zatanna throws the literal Best Parties Ever

**Chip:** That's the AFTER baby shower

**Chip:** or maybe there are two

**Chip:** yes that's it

**Chip:** M'gann's is sweet and adorable and involves lots of cupcakes and pink-and-blue fun (they don't know if it is a boy or a girl yet, because Dick and Artemis want the gender of the baby to be a surprise)

**Chip:** everyone is invited to M'gann's, but Zatanna's party is girls only

**Chip:** Zatanna's party involves a zeta-tube trip to a club she's rented out in NY

**Rosie:** Artemis just wants a low-key baby shower  
and you think she would have learned after what happened at her bachelorette party (they're still banned from the local library thanks to that)  
but she forgot herself and put Zatanna in charge once more

**Chip:** exotic dancers

**Chip:** etc.

**Chip:** Artemis is like WHAT THE HELL I CAN'T EVEN DRINK

**Chip:** SO I'M JUST GOING TO SIT HERE AND LAUGH MY ASS OFF AT ALL OF YOU SLOSHING AROUND

**Chip:** WHAT DOES THIS HAVE TO DO WITH BABIES, HUH

**Chip:** Yes Artemis just didn't want anything

**Rosie:** they're just using her as an excuse to get drunk

**Chip:** but M'gann and Zatanna are pushy and wouldn't say no

**Rosie:** they bring like a crib along for good measure

**Chip:** (hahahaha YES**)**

**Chip:** and the alternative was JADE throwing a party

**Chip:** and that would not have ended well

**Chip:** and Zatanna says something like

**Chip:** "the baby will hear the music and have a good time too!"

**Rosie:** omg zee is my queen

**Chip:** and Artemis is like "listening to Ke$ha = my unborn child having a good time? are you trying to make my child some kind of crazy person"

**Chip:** and even though Artemis griped to her husband about the situation before going, Dick is like nooo go have fun sweetie

**Chip:** while bro-fisting Zatanna for the awesome idea and making sure Cassie, his minion, goes along and takes incriminating pictures of everyone… aka "evidence"

**Chip:** Cassie, Dick, and Artemis later laugh over said pictures and make an album of them

**Chip:** okay anyways

**Chip:** when the baby's approximate due date approaches, there are two false alarms

**Chip:** Dick and Artemis are such new parents that they mistakenly go to the hospital twice thinking it might be "time for the baby" until the actual point when Artemis breaks her water and starts having contractions and there is no doubt that "FUCK IT'S TIME"

**Chip:** the first time they have a false alarm, Artemis is like "I think I'm having some of those symptoms that baby book we mentioned said I should have when…"

**Chip:** and before she can finish her sentence, Dick runs them to the hospital even though it's 2am

**Chip:** the second time Artemis is in the car with her brother-in-law Roy (because it's not as easy for her to drive when she's heavily pregnant) and she freaks out and makes him go to the hospital with her because she's 70% sure it's time

**Chip:** "ROY DRIVE FASTER GDI"

**Chip:** "SHUT UP CROCK I JUST RAN A RED LIGHT"

**Chip:** and when it's a false alarm he's especially cranky with her

**Chip:** not like Roy isn't cranky ALL of the time but still

**Rosie:** what good siblings i'm going to hug them aaawww

**Chip:** the actual time it happens, Artemis is at home with her mom

**Chip:** Artemis complains about cramps or something and thinks it's nothing because hell, she's had 2 false alarms already, let's not have a 3rd, but Paula sees the signs and is like ARTEMIS GET TO THE HOSPITAL RIGHT NOW YOU MUST IT IS IMPORTANT in her strongest Vietnamese accent, accompanied by a lot of cursing in Vietnamese, because Paula can't drive (she's wheel-chair bound) and Artemis can't drive when she's in labor, and Roy and Jade aren't in town

**Chip:** Dick is currently on patrol

**Chip:** he gets the call from Artemis

**Chip:** he drops everything

**Chip:** he doesn't even leave time to get clothes other than his uniform, he just strips down when he arrives at their apartment parking garage, jumps in his car, and tells Artemis to bring the bags they've prepared for the hospital stay and a set of clothes for him to the front of their apartment

**Chip:** Artemis would have gotten a lot of amusement from the fact that Dick picks her up IN HIS UNDERWEAR

**Chip:** but she's too busy on the verge of having a child, and yelling at Dick to hurry up and get her mom in the car gdi

**Rosie:** I love how we've been doing this for almost an hour and she still hasn't had the child pffft  
better than waiting 9 months though

**Chip:** Paula insists that Dick "put some pants on immediately" so he shrugs on the sweat pants Artemis brought and then floors the gas pedal

**Chip:** (sorry I'm taking a long time to tell this aren't I! D: I'm making this up as I go, and I'm a details orientated person as you can probably tell, so it's a lot of info to type up)

**Rosie:** (naaw it's cool! I like that you put so much detail into it there's more to love)

**Chip:** they get there in time, Dick is impressively composed for a first-time father, but he's secretly freaking out on the inside

**Chip:** also the nurses/patients/doctors/rando people at the hospital are like _

**Chip:** and D8

**Chip:** and 8D

**Chip:** because before he can get to the bathroom and change, he's running through the hospital shirtless

**Chip:** mm mm mm

**Rosie:** that's a wonderful image

**Chip:** the female (and homosexual) nurses and doctors (and some patients) are all like "okay hospitals suck but at least we get a free show"

**Rosie:** shirtless dick grayson brings joy and light wherever he goes  
and also many uncomfortable boners

**Chip:** yes indeed he does

**Chip:** oh yeah and he doesn't have shoes because shoes are built into the suit

**Chip:** and to me Dick comes across as a guy that wouldn't think too much about being barefoot in public when the occasion calls for it

**Chip:** Artemis makes sure to make really painfully ugly noises at people who stare too long

**Chip:** because nothing is scarier than an angry woman in labor

**Chip:** and "yes, I'm perfectly secure that my husband loves me and his ass is mine, but SERIOUSLY, HE'S A FATHER WITH A PREGNANT WIFE HAVE SOME DIGNITY"

**Chip:** but anyways

**Chip:** she gets to the delivery room

**Chip:** Dick is allowed to come in and be a part of things without doing anything really except hold Artemis' hand and help her bear the pain and be there for her

**Chip:** she cusses like no tomorrow

**Chip:** and after some pain meds and some excruciating labor, the baby comes

**Chip:** it's a gorgeous baby boy (:

**Rosie:** YAYA CHILDREN BABIES as much as i love details about preganancies (and i really do) the baby is always the best part :'D what name have they picked out?

**Chip:** Benjamin

**Rosie:** can his middle name be vietnamese

**Chip:** his middle name is Peter after his uncle Jason's middle name

**Chip:** or yes his middle name could possibly be Vietnamese

**Chip:** although I don't think Lian is Vietnamese technically… so Artemis doesn't have a Vietnamese middle name

**Chip:** he'll probably have an alternative name in Vietnamese and an English name

**Chip:** like a lot of Chinese kids that I know do

**Rosie:** in my country, everyone gets an english name and a name in our traditional language. it's a great way to honor your culture

**Chip:** mm hm

**Rosie:** but benjamin is an adorable name i love it

**Chip:** I think that's the best way to go

**Chip:** and Benjamin Grayson has such a nice ring to it

**Chip:** Ben Grayson

**Rosie:** Benjamin Grayson has a nice ring to it

**Chip:** yes

**Chip:** hahaha jinx

**Rosie:** darn do i have to buy you a soda?

**Chip:** naw just keep listening to my story

**Chip:** he doesn't have a lot of hair when he's born

**Chip:** but Ben grows up to be a handsome boy with Vietnamese features/his mama's general features and face shape and black hair

**Chip:** and stunning blue eyes

**Chip:** coming from his daddy's side of the family

**Chip:** and also his mom's dad

**Rosie:** literally everyone in the wayne family has blue eyes even the people who shouldn't *cough DAMIAN cough* (i know dick isn't biologically a wayne but still)

**Chip:** Ben has a naturally mischievous look to him

**Chip:** oops should I change his eye color then?

**Rosie:** nooooo i like blue eyes! i just find comic book genetics to be really funny  
Irey Westhas red hair even though there is literally no way that is possible since Linda's hair is fully dominant over Wally's

**Chip:** (they have two other kids besides Ben who I haven't thought up names for, a middle child who is a girl with black? hair and blue? eyes, gorgeous creature, and their youngest who is a boy with blonde hair and brown/dark gray eyes)

**Chip:** yeah haha

**Chip:** DC writers/artists: What are dominant genes?

**Chip:** What are genetics?

**Rosie:** They keep their geneticists in the same place as they keep their female writers

**Chip:** and Stephanie Brown and all those other characters who have passed from existence

**Chip:** in a wormhole somewhere outside of their view of reality

**Rosie:** Steph lives on in my ehart (and my aus)

**Chip:** yes she does in mine as well

**Chip:** oh and random tid-bit

**Chip:** after Artemis recovers from her pregnancy

**Chip:** Dick and Artemis make like mama and papa penguins

**Chip:** as in Papa Dick stays home to take care of the baby, and Artemis gets to do vigilante work solo for a bit

**Chip:** to get all the pent-up adrenaline out of her system

**Chip:** after he grows up a little, Ben is an adorable charmer and a natural-born trouble maker

**Chip:** smart in an Artemis way of smart (not purely intellectual or "let me show you how it's done" or "I'm in charge/the boss and I'm going to lead all of you okay" kind of way)

**Chip:** but the "I'm going to find the one escape route you didn't think of/see on your high tech maps" way

**Chip:** all of their children are gorgeous

**Chip:** but anyways

**Chip:** I need to go to bed now

**Chip:** sleeeepy

**Chip:** anything else you'd like to know about Traught family?

**Rosie:** uuuhhhhh

**Rosie:** pets

**Rosie:** what animals do they have running around their house

**Chip:** omg haven't thought about that one yet!

**Chip:** but they probably should have a dog

**Chip:** a black lab

**Chip:** would be appropriate

**Chip:** for their kind of family

**Chip:** Ben has a thing for reptiles for a while, but his younger sister hates them

**Rosie:** i feel like dick would want a really exotic pet like a chinchilla and artemis wouldn't really understand why but would be okay with it  
and the kids adore it

**Chip:** haha YES

**Chip:** BRILLIANT

**Chip:** it's like every time they go on a trip with Daddy, they come home with some new random pet

**Chip:** and sometimes Artemis has to exercise her veto-pet power because NO WE CANNOT HAVE ANOTHER SNAKE IT WILL EAT BEN'S RAT SNAKE

**Chip:** NO THAT DOG IS OBVIOUSLY DISEASED WE NEED TO TAKE IT TO THE SPCA AND MAKE SURE IT GETS A HOME

**Chip:** NO DICK

**Chip:** NO THAT IS NOT LEGAL TO SELL IN THE U.S. HOW DID YOU FIND THAT DICK

**Rosie:** "BUT LOOK AT HER EYES SHE LOVES ME"

**Chip:** maybe not in all caps

**Chip:** but she would lay down the law

**Chip:** "EVERYTHING LOVES YOU RICHARD JOHN GRAYSON"

**Chip:** "WE CANNOT ADOPT THE WORLD"

**Rosie:** all the kids know artemis gets final say on everything  
dad is pretty scary when he means business but 95% of the time he's a pushover

**Chip:** and so much fun

**Chip:** because circus kid hello

**Chip:** if elephants qualify as pets

**Chip:** everything qualifies as a pet

**Rosie:** the universe loves dick grayson  
and dick grayson loves it back

**Chip:** true that

**Chip:** he's like the definition of loveable

**Rosie:** also the kids will pull the whole "moooooooooom can we rent a limo and go to disneyworld? " "of course not" "but dad already said yes!" because they know mom is less likely to say no if dick's said yes and he will say yes to the first pair of puppy eyes he sees and they're very sneaky children

**Chip:** or if he knows it's not a good idea, he changes their minds and thinks of something else for them to do

**Chip:** but makes them think that it's THEIR idea in the process

**Chip:** parenting = a healthy dose of well-intentioned manipulation haha

**Chip:** Artemis isn't that tactful, so mostly she'll just say "no" or "yes" or "if you do this first, I'll think about it"

**Chip:** they'd balance each other well with parenting styles I think

**Chip:** Dick would learn how to be less of a pushover (not in a bad way, he's still the fun dad)

**Chip:** and Artemis would learn to relax more and to be more flexible

**Chip:** because her parents were both very authoritative in their parenting styles and she hasn't known any differently

**Rosie:** would any of the kids be interested in the superhero life? woudl dick and arty want them to get involved?

**Chip:** They wouldn't push them to do anything, but I imagine they would be open about "Mom and Daddy have these things called 'secret identities' and we kind of save the world every once in a while" when the kids are at an appropriate age to know about superheroes and such

**Chip:** they're also very protective of their kids

**Chip:** because they don't want people targeting Nightwing/Artemis through their children

**Chip:** so no, I don't think the kids initially get into superheroing

**Chip:** and one or maybe even two of them will probably find ways to serve the world as something other than a vigilante

**Chip:** but that adrenalin and fire they get from their parents runs in their blood, so they grow to be charismatic, strong people who make changes and make an impact in whatever they do

**Chip:** Dick and Arty just want their kids to do whatever makes them happy

**Rosie:** (omg chip you needed to go to bed and i distracted you. go to sleep, fool)

**Chip:** there is some unspoken/spoken pressure coming from the vigilante members of the family to be a superhero (because superheroing is kind of the "family business…" well, besides Lawrence), but the Grayson kids figure things out for themselves and all is well

**Chip:** anyway yeah

**Chip:** bed

**Chip:** I hope you enjoyed my story time

**Rosie:** I did!

**Chip:** I had fun telling it (:

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**A.N.** Sorry all of y'all! I know I haven't updated in an eon, and this is a bit of an unconventional way to tell a story. However, I hope you enjoy it anyways, and hopefully y'all's encouraging reviews will provide the right incentive for me to get back to work updating more regularly and continuing some of the stories I haven't yet finished.


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